Diary!!~
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Got braces fixed
FEELING: neutral
LISTENING TO: NewJeans - Cool With You
i got my braces fixed. dentist changed the archwire and added an elastic. it hurts like hell and painkillers arent helping, theres nothing i can do ig. now i need to wait until my appointment next month. also i almost finished my project, i only have presentation left. oh and a few days ago i met #### and we talked, but i wish i hadnt met her that day, i just want her to forget about me. she got a bf and moved on. she still says that im important to her,it really upsets me..but whatever...
I ate cake
Boriiinggg
FEELING: hopeful
LISTENING TO: LE SSERAFIM - Impurities
today was such a boring day, i really thought i would die out of boredom. it rained all day, i couldnt even leave the house to go for a walk or pick up my package. so after a long time i finally decided to check my shelf and i found some CDs with k-pop songs and mangas. i listened to them and read every manga ... even found some comic named "heartstopper", i honestly dont know why i have it but...oh well
also my dad told me that i can have a spider. it was my dream and im really happy
Same mistake
FEELING: tired
LISTENING TO: -
i keep pushing everyone away. im so used to being alone that when i start to talk to someone, i just ignore them later. i told myself that its easier being alone, i dont want to leave my comfort zone. also my best friend stopped talking to me.ig she just moved on. maybe if i keep trying everything would be okay but I gave up. and about my other friends. ### kept saying that i should block them. they were okay, but he insisted that they were terrible, so i blocked them. but then I realised that even if they were bad, at least i had someone i could talk to. i dont know if i did the right thing. now im alone again..maybe its better this way. i dont need friends, i just need to focus on my studies and my future.
are u happy now?
Friend from the Past
FEELING: hopeful
LISTENING TO: The Marias - Only in My Dreams
today was a good day, i want to believe that. i woke up at 2pm and got really upset bc i had alarm set for 10am. then my sis and her bf texted me asking if i wanted to play roblox with them. i agreed bc i had nothing better to do. we wanted to play at 7pm, so while i was waiting, i decided to open the game after not playing 2-3 months. when i opened roblox, i saw my friend who i used to talk towith everyday was online, but i knew there was no point in texting him bc he was avoiding me. then i got upset and wanted to cheer myself up with playing femboy obby, and then he joined. we talked for hours about random things, i was happy to talk with him again, even though in the past we would argue and be mean to each other. i just hope we can be best friends again. im used to being always alone, but its nice to talk with someone. i also made new friend while we were playing together, or maybe its just a +1 to my friend list, who knows.
First Diary Post
FEELING: upset
LISTENING TO: ILLIT - jellyous
this is the first post!1 its more like a test, so yeah. its currently 2:36AM, ill probably go to bed at 5AM. today (or yesterday, to be sure), was kinda bad. i was talking about my future with parents and i really wanted to cry bc i dont know who i want to be when i grow up. in 5 months im gonna be 18 and im very scared.very. my parents are gonna send me to my sis for a week and idk im afraid ill be a burden to her. i wish i was like her, never scared of the unknown, brave and strong, and no matter what happens, she would always find an answer. shes great, i wish i wasnt an anxious loser.